Kuon awake
by Asuka-mangalover
Summary: Koun is awake with no memories of his life as 'Tsuruga-ren'. He is totally lost in a new time, and a new world. He is now the top actor in Japan and have to live up to 'Tsuruga Ren' and in the same time fight with his haunting memories.
1. Chapter 1

Hello! This is a story about Kuon and what could happen if he waked up and had no memories of his life as 'Tsuruga Ren'. The story is in I-form and will be through the rest of the chapters. Read and enjoy!

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_Someone screamed my name. The voice was cold as ice. The blood flowed beneath my feet. Blood was everywhere. I couldn't breath, my air was dispersing. It hurted. The picture of the dead body was the last thing I would see before closing my eyes for good. I could still hear the voice screaming at me, but I didn't care. I slowly felt how my body was freezing. No one would wake me up. This nightmare was real. I didn't want to belive, didn't want to see, I was scared. I closed my eyes. It was dark and I heard the voice scream one last time. "You murder!" before it disappeared._

I woke up drowsily, sweat ran down my brow. I got to see a girl siting by my side. Her face was pale and worried. I didn't know the girl. I hadn't seen her before. But still something in my mind told me I knew her. Her eyes looked at me with warmth, She sighed with relief. I looked around in the room, it was in was also very unknown, but still so familiar. Like something in a distant dream. It looked like a hotel room. The room was rather small, it had two beds and a door till what I guessed was the toilet.

"Nii-san. You alright?" The girl asked and lended over the bed where I lay. her long hair touched my face. What/who was this 'nee-san' that she called. She was talking English at least so I did undestand what she said.

"Were am I and who are you?" I asked and tried not sound like a confused alcoholic. Because it was probably the thing that had happened. I had maybe had drunken to much at some party the night before. It was awkward I hoped I didn't to anything stupid. This weird girl looked like someone that could drink. She was dressed in a black short top and a pair tight black pants. Kind of sexy. She had probably been drunk too and they had probably went to some love-hotel to have fun. It was an unconfortable situation. I had to do something.

"What's your name?" I asked. She now looked very confused and I didn't know what to do. Her face was showing so many emotions that I felt even more guilty. What if I had done something to her.

She hesitated and said; "My name is Setsuka Heel. I'm your sister." It didn't sound like she believed in what she said. My sister? No, it did not sound right. I had no siblings. She was maybe even more dizzy then what I was. She looked young. What could she be, sixteen or something. Oh god, what an problamatic situation. I needed a phone so I could take us home, I would call a taxi or something like that. But first I needed to know how drunk she was, she maybe even needed a doctor.

"Tell me all you can remember from last night. Tell me how old you are and if you remember something more tell me that too." I said and tried act clam. She looked back at me in surprise. It was not the best questions that I could come up with but it was hopefully good enough.

"Okay..? I'm seventeen. Yesterday I was working. I'm working as an actor, Im now acting as your sister and I'm-..."

"What?" I interrupted and tried remember all she had said. "You are an actor? ..act as my sister? Sorry, I don't understand." It was now my turn to be confused.

She gave me a worried face. "Yes, I'm an actor and so are you." She looked like she was about to cry. "Don't you remember Tsuruga-san!? You are an actor. I'm Kyoko!"

Who was this 'Tsuruga-san' she called out? And what did she mean don't remember. What is it that I must remember. Damn. What is this, some kind of joke?

"Tsuruga-san don't you remember who you are?" She said and her voice was about to break. Her big, cute golden eyes was wet and full of tears.

I sighed. "My name is Kuon Hizuri. I'm 17 and I'm a student." She looked at me. Like if she didn't belive what I said. I saw how she jumped up on her feet and took out her phone while mumbling something in what I could hear was Japanese.

"Oh my this is bad. He has lost his mind. Maybe hit his head or something." The girl said and called out someone on the phone. This girl is crazy. I haven't lost my mind I know fully who I am. I'm Koun, the son of the famous Kuu Hizuri.

Setsuka, if that were her real name or not I didn't know, started to go around in the room talking in her phone with someone on Japanese. I can understand Japanese because dad often worked there. But I can't say I'm good at it. I managed to catch a few words she said. something about losing memory, mission, taxi and about some wierd shooting.

I closed my eyes and tried my best to remember what happened last day but my mind was blank. It was scary, like I didn't have a yesterday. I tried to remember what was the last thing I've done but nothing come up. There was a small memory of my hometown in America. Suddenly a picture flowed in my mind. The picture of a dead body. Like in that dream. No, it wasn't a dream it was that terrible day so many year ago. Why is I remember that now? His name. What was it, yes Rick. The boy who died was named Rick. He was my friend. So many pictures and memories haunted my mind. I felt pain, so much pain. Stop it! I can't handle anymore. _You murder! _No stop. Her voice was screaming in my ears. _Murder. You murder Koun. You killed Rick! I will never forgive you, never!_


	2. Chapter 2

´Chapter 2´

I waked up with a headache. I opened my eyes and once again looked out in an unknown environment. Were was I? It was like a room in a castle, big windows and shining clean walls. The room was big as a ballroom. I was laying in a sofa. I sat up so I could see the environment more. On an armchair a few meters away could I see a man siting reading a mangabook.

"Excuse me?" I said. The man suddenly turned to face me. To my big surprise I recognized the face. I did know the face, It was a man I had met before somewhere. He had a big pirate hat on his head that remanded me of some friend of dad I had meet in the past before, but I could not put the finger on what his name was.

"You finely awaked my boy." He said with a gentle voice like if he knew me. "You fainted while Mogami-san were calling me to get you."

"Could you please tell me were I am and just give me a phone so I can get a taxi home." I said and stood up on my feet. They felt a bit unsteady.

"Relax. You have to take it slow. Tell me first what you call yourself." The man said and stared intently at me.

I just sighed. How many times did I have to tell. "My name is Koun Hizuri. I'm 17 and I'm living in America, Washington."

The man gave me an eye. And muttered something to himself in japanese and then returned to talk in english with me. "17 you say? It seems like you have returned to your old self my boy. Tell me," He took a short pause. "What year do you think it is?"

I had to idea what he talked about. My old self? Oh god, what is this crazy old man talking about. What year he said. Em.. I think it must be 1994 or 1996. My head hurted, I felt angry that couldn't remember something that was so obvious. It was like I had been asleep very,very long. The man still stared at me. I did not like the feeling.

"2008" I said and tried sound confident.

The man in front of me just shook his head and gave me a sad face. "You really don't remember, don't you." He said worried.

What a hell was it that I needed to remember. Why was everybody I meet talking to me like I had completely forgot my whole life. "What is it that I have to remember!" I said irritated. I could not stand it anymore. I wanted to come out from here. Leve this crazy place and just forget this day. I glared at him.

"It's actually year 2012." The man said. "You are 21 years old now, an adult."

I shook my head. No he lied. It could not be true. I was 17, not 21. I needed to come out of this bedlam now! This man was clearly insane and lived in a bedlam. Suddenly I saw how he took up something from his pocket. It was a little mirror. He handed it over. I did not want it but I had not much of a choice. I received the mirror and saw my face reflect in the mirror. I was about to fall of my chair. It couldn't be.. me? In the mirror was a man, a man! A grown up version of myself with dark brown hair and brown eyes. I was not sure what to belive anymore. The man was so much like me, except from the hair and the eyes.

"You colored your hair so no one would know you were american. The eyes are also fake, its contact lenses you can take them of." The man said like if he had read my mind.

I slowly did as he told me. My fingers touched the eye and I felt how the lens were out. It felt strange, my eyes hurt a bit then I touched them. I looked in the mirror and saw my real eyes. Eyes that I knew belonged to me.

"Who are you? And how do you know all this?" I asked. The man smiled.

"My name is Lory Takida. I'm a friend of your father. I have known you for a long time. You work here in for me as the top actor in Japan." Lory said and smiled proud.

Did he just call _me_ the top actor, in, in JAPAN?!


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry if there is any spellnings-and grammar errors. Please try to don't let them distract your reading. xD

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'chapter 3'

I sat there, my legs were shaking. I was scared! And that was something that didn't happen often. Was all the things Lory told me true? Had I ran away from home to Japan and become an actor, had I been praying to him for help, had I begin my career and now almost four years later I was the best male actor in **Japan**!? He also told me the girl I meet before called Kyoko Mogami was my lover?! Or more said the girl I loved.

This did not happened. It was just so crazy. I walked out from the building I really needed fresh air. Then I come out I suddenly actually understanded that I was in Tokyo. It was a bit of a shock. So many people walking on the streets. They looked at me with big eyes and shouted; "Look isn't that Ren Tsuruga!?" It felt weird being called that even though Lory told me it was my 'stage name'. I just smiled at them and walked along the street. After a while in the air I was walking back again. With the front door I saw a girl waiting for me. She had orange short hair and a pair of golden eyes that flashed then she saw me.

"Hi Tsuruga-san feeling better?" She asked in Japanese, I did understand her so I nodded my head a little.

"Sorry, what was your name again?" I said in bad japanese and tried not to hurt her. Whoever she was, she seemed to know the 'Tsuruga Ren' that wasn't me.

She was a little hurt I could see, but more worried. "You still haven't got your memory back. Tsuruga-san, I'm Kyoko Mogami your kohai."

Eh? So this girl is the Kyoko Mogami as that man was talking about, the so called girl I loved. But I though she was that other person back at the hotel this girl was totally different. She wore no make-up, her hair stuck out in all different directions and she had normal, pretty boring clothes and had no body shapes at all. Why would I have fallen for a boring girl like her. But on the other hand could it be that this was her true self? That must mean that the Setsu-girl I meet before was just an act.

"Oh hello, I'm sorry I did not remember you. My memory isn't what it generally tends to be." I said and gave her one of my charming smiles. To my surprise she did not fall for it. All the girls back home in America loved it.

She followed me up to Lory's office. It was a bit hard to belive that a man like him was the boss of LME. Then I though about it I actually remembered that I had visited LME once before with my dad. It was a long ago I maybe was 11 years old or something.

Then we came up to the office there were an other man sitting on a chair talking to Lory. He had pretty normal Japanese brown hair and wore glasses.

Lory turned to face me and Kyoko. He smiled at us. I closed the door behind us and sat down i the sofa. Kyoko sat down to in the other end. I didn't now why but I felt a bit hurt that she didn't want to sit near beside me.

"So now when all people are here I whan to explain the situation." Lory said. We all listened carefully to know what he wanted to say.

"As I all explained to you before on the phone, has Ren lost his memory. He only have his memory's left from the time he was 17. I don't think it's a good idea to let him work today so I have decided to let him have a day off. Yashiro I want you to set all Ren's interviews and filming's. And you Mogami-san I what you to help Ren to find back his memories."

All in the room was quiet. Or to say silent. I felt a bit irritation of being called 'Ren who have lost his memory' but I knew that it was probably true. I didn't have any other explainesions of what that could have happened. And not enough with that, now I would have to spend the day with this girl I didn't even remember.


	4. Chapter 4

'chapter 4'

"_Are you going to fight Kuon? Or are you afraid to make mummy and daddy angry." A annoying voice called in my head. I head myself answer. "It is you, who are scared." And memories of a fight flashed through my mind. I heard screams. Cold screams in the dark night. Suddenly I heard a voice whispering in my ear. "Tsuruga-san." I saw a light. It burned in my frozen heart. I felt a warm hand touching mine. I saw a face in the dark. A girl? She was shining, her orange hair was burning like fire. The flames were lightening up around me. I loved the light, I loved her warmth and her smile. _

_._

Suddenly I noticed that I was sitting in a car. The girl was sitting beside me and called out this 'Tsuruga-san' person. I knew that Lory had told me that Ren Tsuruga and I was the same person but in my mind it felt like he was a totally different person I had never met. A person that had been living inside my body for almost 4 years.

"Tsuruga-san are you alright, you looked so pale. You didn't answer me. I'm worried are you not feeling alright?"

I smiled at her. She was worried about me. "I'm okay. I just were lost in thought." She did not seems to belive me. The car stopped and she ordered me to go out. We had stopped in front of a big apartment. The chauffeur said goodbye and leaved us standing there alone one the street. She walked up to the house. I followed her.

"Who's house it is?" I asked. I really wondered who would have such a beautiful house. Maybe the president, he had probably the money to. Or it could be her house too.

The girl smiled. "It's yours."_ Eh, it's mine?_ She laughed at my stupid face. For me it was a bit of a surprise, I did not think I would live in this kind of house. In my pocket we found the card to the house. Home in America we also had cards so we could come in to the house instead of keys.

Then we walked in I could feel a wonderful smell, it actually felt like home. The interior was pretty simple, a few paintings not anything special. But it really felt like I had been there before.

"Is it familiar?" She asked.

"Yes, a bit."

We walked around in the house looking at all the room. I was very big for just one person. After the tour I sat sown in the sofa and Kyoko started making something in the kitchen. It was a bit surprising that she was so comfortable in the house, it was a man's house after all.

I started the TV and after a few switches I found a tv-drama with English sub. I didn't know exactly what it was about I just happened to come in the middle. There was a schoolgirl that was in love with her teacher.

After I had looked at the programs a while I started to recognize the man who played the teacher. He looked like a lot like... like me in the mirror! I was playing this drama and I was good! I smiled at myself. It was pretty funny to watch and see myself acting. A very weird feeling.

"Tsuruga-san what are you watching?" The girl suddenly asked. She had walked up and was now standing beside the sofa. "Oh, you are watching 'Dark moon'. You now, you actually acted as one of the main characters in it."

"Yes I saw that." I said and felt proud. She sat down beside me, this time a little closer.

"I were actually also in it." She said I turned to her to face her. She was in it? "Who did you play?" I asked and felt that I was really curious.

"I played Mio." She pointed at the TV. "You see she there." I turned to the TV, on the screen was now a black-haired girl with cold eyes that glared at the girl that if I remembered right was named Mizuki or something like that, who was in love with my character. I was really surprised, I would never had guessed that the cold almost scary girl on the TV and the girl beside me were the same person. That must mean that this Kyoko Mogami is really a good actor.

"Tsuruga-san.."

Hearing her call me that, I don't know why but I felt irritated by being called that. I could feel the anger and irritation in me grow. Why ´Tsuruga-san´? Why did Japan have such complicated ways of calling each other why don't they just use frist name like in America or couldn't she just call me Ren or my real name Kuon it would be so much easier.

"Tsuruga-san, what is it?"

My mood was swinging. "Can you just stop calling me that!" I shouted right in her face.

She jumped in her seat, surprised my suddenly voice raising. "Why..?" She said low.

"Don't call me that, I don't like it." I muttered. "It's a fake-name anyway."

"Eh..? What do you mean?" She wondered.

"I said, it's just a fake name to hide my true name. I'm named Kuon, Kuon Hizuri.." I said and sighed. She really started to go on my nerves.

I could see on her face that she was confused. Does that mean she didn't know my true identity? That I'm from america and all that stuff. I don't know how but she suddenly discovered a connection. Her eyes was lighting up and a bright smile came to her face.

"Kuon Hizuri, like in Kuu Hizuri?" She now seemed exited. Maybe she was a big fan of dad or something.

I nodded. "Yeah, he's my dad." Kyoko just stared at me in shock, I guess I can understand her if someone would come to me and say that he was the son of the king of England or something I would probably be kind of shocked. (A/N of corse Kuon would compare his dad with the king. xD )

"He's..you-'re ..d-ad?" She stammered. "That must mean you're Kuon,..no, no, you're lying! You can't be-"

She was now very confused I could tell. I signed, it was best to take it clam. "Yes I'm Kuon."

She was now quiet. She was giving it all a thought. She stared down at her legs. It was all quiet. A millions seconds passed away. I just sat there staring at her. Her short orange hair looked so soft, I wanted to touch it but I refrained. I suddenly heard her mumbling something. "Why, why didn't he say you were alive, and so near?" I heard her say.

What was she talking about? I didn't understand. Oh this was irritating, why couldn't I just take the fly back to America instead of being here with this girl. There was girls there in America who would do everything, and I mean _everything, _to hang out with me. Not like this, there I just haved sit there and watch a girl in shock. I started to feel even more angry and desperate, I wanted all to go back to the normal life I had before.

"Tsuruga-san." She said softly. "Is it true that you are kuu's father?" It was something in her voice that made me clam down a bit. Her golden eyes stared at me and waited for an answer. "Yes." I finely said.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked. What should I answer? I didn't know why I didn't tell her, I didn't even know what I had been doing this last years. My memory was totally blank, like a black hole. It was sad because in some way I wanted to remember her, and all the memories we had together. She was somehow important to me. I wanted her happy. I didn't like seeing her sad.

I stretched out my hand and gently stroked her cheek. "I don't remember why, but I'm sure It had it's reasons." She slowly nodded her head. We sat quiet for awhile. It was Kyoko who broke the silence. "I made some fruit salad and I wondered if you wanted some." She said a bit happier.

"Yes please." I said politely.

But to be honest I didn't really want any, but I said yes for her sake. It was good if she got something else on her mind. I saw her run away to the kitchen. I leaned back in the sofa. I felt tired. I closed my eyes and relaxed a bit and listened to the voices from the TV. Slowly I fell asleep.

I did not know how long I slept I just remember feeling warmth. I opened my eyes and saw a girl laying against my shoulder. I felt warm. I saw that she was still sleeping. I put my arm around her and stroke her hair softly. She smelled nice, her wonderful scent was all I could feel. I closed my eyes again and hoped she wouldn't wake up in a while.

But the luck was not on my side this morning. After a little while I felt that she started to move. She suddenly started cuddling me and turned around so she was now lying with her face towards me. She was cute then she slept. But it didn't take long before she slowly started to opened her eyes. when her eyes were accustomed to the light she started to realise where she was. She recoiled and sat up. I didn't know why but she seemed scared of the fact that she had slept on my shoulder.

"Sorry Tsuruga-san, you slept so I didn't want to wake you up and I kind of fell asleep too." She apologised.

"It doesn't matter to me, It was nice having you sleep with me." I said with a smirk and put my arm around her and I saw her turn in panic. It was funny to see her so afraid of body contact, maybe all Japanese people was like this. If they was, this place would be a big different from America then people hugged each other all the time.

"Tsugruga-san..-"

"Stop calling me that! It's Kuon." I shouted. I didn't want her calling me by that name. I didn't like it. It felt like she called another man.

"But..-" Before she had said what she wanted I had pushed her down in the sofa and was now over her. I looked down at her, she was in panic, her face was red and full of thought. I smiled. This would be funny. I didn't know why, but it was something about her that made me want to her. My body was full of electric energy. I pulled closer to her and closed the distance be twin us. I pressed my lips against hers. I liked it.

Sadly I didn't remember much of it, because it ended as fast as it happened. She pulled me away from her as fast as my lips touched hers. Did she hate it so much? I hoped not, because what I could remember, I was a good kisser.

She stared at me in shock. Her thoughts were full of me. I smiled. "What was it that you are supposed to call me..-?"

She was still quiet, frozen without being unable to move. I won. I had taken her under my control. She opened her mouth and slowly let herself say it. "Kuon." She whispered. I smiled with satisfaction.

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A/N; Wooah.. Is Kuon starting to sound like Sho now..? I don't know to where this going lead. One thing is, that I have started having problem with writing in 'I-form', it's kind of hard. But I will do my best. Please I would be happy if you want to leave a comment. :D


	5. Chapter 5

´chapter 5`

Time went by and we were picked up by the car an hour later. None of us had said a word to each other since then. Kyoko had been in the kitchen all the time to avoid me and I had been mostly in the livingroom. It was really awkward be twin us. It seemed almost like she was afraid of me, not strange maybe. To be honest, I had not treated her so good. But I couldn't help that it irritated me so much then she called me 'Tsuruga-san' or then she ignored me. I wanted all the attention.

Then we arrived to the LME building we both walked up to Lory's office on the highest floor.

"There you are!" Lory shouted happily.

Lory turned to Kyoko and gave her a comforting smile. "Mogami-san, thank you for taking care of Ren yesterday. I know you have some work today so you can go so you don't have to be in a hurry."

Kyoko nodded her head and walked out from the room.

Lory turned against me and made a movement, and showed me to sit down. I sat down in a chair, so did Lory. He smiled at me but I did not smile back, I felt angry and in a bad mood.

"Did it go well yesterday?" He said and raised his eyebrows. I gave him a cold glare. I felt very irritated by him asking me that. I was restless, I wanted to hit somebody to remove my anger. But I did my best to not.

"Even if you have lost your memory from the last 4 years we sadly have to make you go back to work very soon. To soon actually, but we don't have much of a choice." Lory signed. "But I think we could come up with a story about a car accident to explain your blackouts. But we still actually we do not know what made you lost the last memories of your life." Lory explained.

I just stared at him. I had no desire to work. I had no desire to do anything. I hated this, why couldn't all just be like before?

"Do you think you can handle it?" Lory asked.

Sighed and muttered a quiet "Yes sir." As an answer.

"Good." Lory said and showed me a pound smile.

"Anything more?" I wondered irritated.

"Yes, I would want you to start looking at this scrip to a new drama." Lory said and handed over a script called _'lost in your arms'._

After that, I took the taxi to my apartment, ordered one pizza and sat down in front of the TV. After siting there awhile I started to feel that it in some way felt lonely without her running around. Maybe it was just my imagination, it would be fine with any girl.

But even through I told my self that, I could not get rid of the picture of her in my head. I did not want any other girls besides her. In my mind she was the only one I could imagine siting by my side watching tv and eat of the pizza.

I had never felt this feeling before, it was the feeling of missing.

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A/N: This is a very short chapter, I know. But I'm going to publish one more tomorrow or the day after that so this one became a little shorter. So please don't be disipointed. :D


	6. Chapter 6

'chapter 6'

I let my fingers role on the touchscreen and after a while I found her. In the middle of the contacts I found her name and beside it a little picture of her. I pressed my finger on it and called her. A few signals were calling out before I heard her voice. I smiled.

"Hi, it's Mogami Kyoko.."

"Hello. It's Kuon." I said and heard her gasp in the other end. I smiled and was about to say something teasingly, but I suddenly changed my mind. She was probably scared of me and it was maybe better to say something nicer.

It was strange I never used to think like this, to care so much about the other person. But with her, it was something different. I wanted her to like me. Forgive me. Think of me. Care for me. Feelings that slowly had taken over me. Like a stong force from the inside.

"Sorry for earlier." I paused a second. "I wondered if... you would come eat dinner with me? I have pizza left." I said and tried my best to sound gentle in my voice.

It was quiet for a while. And then she answered.

"Okay." she said, a little hesitantly. "But only if you let me cook something instead." She said and it sounded like if she was a bit happier.

"Okay, that's good. Um, See ya." I said and hung up. My heart was beating hard in my chest. But after talking to her I felt better than before, it was like my body felt so much lighter.

•••

About a half hour later she was standing outside my door. I let her in and she smiled heavenly at me. I felt so happy seeing her that I wanted to hug her but I did my best to not. I wouldn't scare her again.

We sat down with the table, Kyoko ate some leftovers from the yesterdays food and I ate what was left from the pizza. We both sat there quiet with nothing to say. I didn't know what I should talk with her about. I didn't know what she liked or what interests she had. But suddenly something came to my mind.

"Are you a fan of my dad, or something?" I said to make her start a conversation with me.

She smiled at me and laughed a bit. "No, or yes. I do truly respect him, he's a very good actor. I meet him a couple mouth ago then he was visiting Japan. I worked as his "helper", and it ended up that he would give me a lot's of (tips) in my acting." She was suddenly very exiting and started to tell me all about his visiting in japan and about how he helpt her with her role she had problem with and how she was acting as his son, who she though was dead. But it was me, who was 'Tsugruga Ren' and who was Kuon, and Kuon who was me.

Yes, I know It really sounded complicated then she told me about it. Her confused face was so cute that it made me start laughing, something that I hadn't been doing in a long time in my old day's as Kuon.

She smiled and started laughing too.

Then we catched our breath we stared at each other for awhile. A cute smile was playing over her face.

"Can I ask you something." I said with a serious tone. Her smile disappeared and she nodded her head and looked at me with the same serious look in her eyes.

"Ask me everything you want." She said without (tvekan).

I let out a sexy smile and leaned closer to her across the table. "Are you and I secretly going out?" I wispered in her ear.

She turned into panic. "No! A-bso-lutly no-t!" She shouted.

"How sad~, but I guess we can change that if you want sweetie." I said and was about to burst into laugher again after seeing her blushing face. She was cute. Still not really not my type, I use to prefer hotties with big curves. But she was different, I felt that I wanted to be with her because of her smile not her body.

"Kyoko." I said with a serious tone. "I like you." And I gave her a warm comforting smile smile.

She looked at me, it was no longer fear in her eyes. My smile made her comfortable again. She smiled back a shy smile.

"Thanks, you are nice too Tsu-.. I mean Kuon." She said and the light blush on her face became darker. Her face was red of embarrassment just by saying I was nice? First of all had she missunderstanded my like for a friendly like, wich it one way was. But still It disappointed me a little that she thought that I meant 'I like you' as a friend. But on my 'like' wasn't really a lover's 'like' either.

But on the other hand what can you exept from a young girl like her.., no what was I saying she must be over 15 or even older. She must have been i some contact with love. Or not? Did she ever have a boyfriend, ever kissed anybody. Maybe I even took away her first kiss!? It must be the reason why she was so terrified. Oh, god what an idiot I am. I have to apologise.

"Have you had some contact with love and stuff in your life? If you don't, I'm sorry that I took away your first kiss." I said and felt really ashamed. I gave her a apologising face.

She waved her hands dramatically. "Oh no it wasn't my first kiss, it just that, um I.. I don't really have, I don't.., I mean love didn't go so well for me in the past so I don't ever going to fall in love again!" She said firmly and it was something dark and scary in her eyes. She glared angry at the table in front of her. I could hear her mumbling something.

"Damn you Shotaro!" I heard her say for herself. I was surprised I didn't think she was the one that swore like that.

"Tell me what happened." I said and she looked up in my eyes with surprise she was out of her trance and back to normal.

"You want me to tell you what happened?" She wondered.

I nodded my head. Yes I wanted to now what ever happened, it seemed like she still were angry for it.

She signed. "It's a bit of a long story. I grew up in Kyoto and.."

"You grew up in Kyoto?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah, and I lived there with my mum and a boy named Shotaro's parents. Mum didn't like me, she alway was very mean to me. She could be away for a long time and leve me all alone. Therefor I used to live with Shotaro's famille. I loved him in that time. "Her eyes was once again dark and she was showing out a evil aura.

"Then we grow older, Sho wanted to move to Tokyo to become a singer so he asked me to come with him. But the truth is that he only used me as a maid to clean his home, pay his rent and cook him food. He didn't even like me." Her voice was full of hate, sorrow and regret.

"I was blinded by my love so I didn't see it untill I heard him say it with his own words. That day I swore to never ever again fall in love again." She almost shouted.

I was a bit stunned by her story. I didn't think she would have this kind of past. I started to wonder what to do about it. I didn't want her to live unhappy the rest of her life. because what I saw in her dark eyes hurted me too.

* * *

A/N: It seems like Ren is starting to take a little control over Kuon again, and now then he know about her past, what will he do? You have to read the rest upcoming chapters to found out. xD

This chapter would actually come out last friday but I became sick and couldn't publish it then. Sorry about that, but that's life, you will be sick sometimes.

( *then Kyoko say that Kuon is nice does I mean nice as in; "pleastant" )


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